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Friday, July 23, 2010

Apparently she thinks she can travel the world now

My kids are all on a summer swim team.
We've been doing this for 6 summers.

Ours is a little different in that we actual belong to a Canadian group, eh.

We are the only American team. It's pretty neat really. Like at all the swim meets they always sing our National Anthem for us.

It's kind of a World Peace thing happening in our small part of  the world.
2 Countries. 1 team.

So there is another swim meet this weekend.
It's far away.
No Hotels.

We've never been to this particular meet. It's far away and I usually am starting to get burnt out by this point.

Cue my daughter.
Her and her best friend and their other friend,who happens to be an assistant coach this year, all wanted to go.
Alone.

They came up with a plan.
Camp.
Pack their own food.
Check in with the other swim team parents that would be there.
Call home each day.

Somehow we said yes.
To Canada. 3 teenage girls.
And one is 19. Isn't that the legal drinking age in Canada?

Thinking I might not get much sleep this weekend.

Thursday, July 15, 2010

We shared a moment at the airport

I got to the airport only a half hour early yesterday. I had the 2 little sisters and the best friend in tow.
We were denied access to go right to her arriving gate.
how rude.
So we waited it out along a wall right where she would exit.
The anticipation of seeing my daughter kept getting to me, as in tears, and I finally had to go in the restroom and blow my nose.

As I came back out I noticed another Mom standing by my spot.
She was crying too.

I asked her if she was waiting for someone.
"Yes," she said "My Son." and she cried even more.
I told her I was waiting for my daughter.
Which made me cry. even more.

I asked where he'd been.
She said he and his wife have been in China for the last year.

"I haven't seen them in a year!  How long has your daughter been gone?"

"well only 15 days  which seemed really long until talking to you..."

We both laughed.

But then she handed me one of her tissues.
And said "When your a Mom, 15 days is a long time too."

Moms. Sharing tissues. It's what we do.

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Home

My daughter is almost home.

Her plane will be here at 1:03pm.

I haven't set eyes on her in 15 days.

When I try and picture her beautiful face in my mind you know what I see?

I see her little.  Her little chubby smiley face. Holding her little pudgy arms out to me to hug.

I have a feeling that's not what's going to be walking off that plane though.

Ok, gotta go. It's 6:20 am. Is that a little too early to head to the airport?

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Desire and Despair

This was in my email in-box this morning...........


Tuesday, July 13, 2010



Life Without My Closest Friend


"Despair," wrote James Houston, "is the fate of the desiring soul." Or as Scripture says, "Hope deferred makes the heart sick" (Prov. 13:12 NLT). How agonizing it can be to awaken desire! Over the past year I have wrestled deeply with what it means to go on. God has come to me again and again, insisting that I not give up the dream. I have ranted and railed, fought him and dismissed him. It feels crazy to desire anymore. What does it mean to live the rest of my life without my closest friend? I think of Lewis and Clark, those inseparable wilderness explorers, how we cannot think of one without the other. Lewis said of his companion, "I could neither hope, wish, nor expect from a union with any man on earth, more perfect support or further aid in the discharge of my mission, than that, which I am confident I shall derive from being associated with yourself." I know I shall never find another like him.





But I am not alone in this. Most of you will by this time have lost a parent, a spouse, even a child. Your hopes for your career have not panned out. Your health has given way. Relationships have turned sour. We all know the dilemma of desire, how awful it feels to open our hearts to joy, only to have grief come in. They go together. We know that. What we don't know is what to do with it, how to live in this world with desire so deep in us and disappointment lurking behind every corner. After we've taken a few Arrows, dare we even desire?

Something in me knows that to kill desire is to kill my heart altogether.






(Desire , 22-23)
John and Stasi Eldredge 


Desire and despair. I think I knew they usually go to together. But what really got me was this line;

how to live in this world with desire so deep in us and disappointment lurking behind every corner.

How do we live this. It's hard. But the alternative, to live with no desires in your heart, well I would have to agree, it would kill my heart altogether.

And with your best friend by your side, like Lewis and Clark, there is no turning back.
I like that.
Jesus is to me as Lewis is to Clark. You can't think of one without the other.

Friday, July 9, 2010

A review and an idea

I just read

The Time Traveler's Wife
by
Audrey Niffenegger


I did not see the movie awhile back but I had really wanted to.

I thought the book was...........weird.
I loved the idea; Time travel, a timeless love story........
but it was kinda slow and at times pointless and what really got me was the language and the s. e. x., like it just seemed a little much at times....

So this brings me to my idea.........
I think books should totally have a rating system like movies do.
It could be small little square in the back with a G to an R and tell you why; how much bad language, how detailed s. e. x. scenes were described......etc.

I love to read. I read alot and I can read fast. I love all kinds of books. But I do try to be careful with what I read, just like what I watch. I rarely watch a rated R movie. It has to be something I really want to see, but at least with  a movie I can be warned about what I may see and make my decision beforehand.

What do you think? Good idea or totally breaks some kind of free speech writers rule?

Sunday, July 4, 2010

POST 100!!!!!

So, it's my 100th post and I like to keep traditions.
This is still a tradition right?

Here are 100 facts about me.
I like how I started this blog to be about my oldest daughter and now it has quickly become all about me.
I don't think she'll be that surprised when she reads this someday!

Be prepared.

For what? I don't know...boredom, shocking facts, who knows....you let me know, k!

1.  I was born in a cabin (not a hospital)
2.  My middle name is Friend
3.  We then lived in a Teepee (or Tipi) seriously
4.  My parents were obviously hippies
5.  My Grandma used to come and get me and take me home and give me baths.
6.  I went to South America when I was 1, with my hippie parents.
7.  I have no idea what we were doing there, and it's not something I can get
     either of them to talk about     
8. There is a rumor that I was almost stolen because some people there had
     never seen a white, blonde haired, blue eyed baby
9.  My Mom left there soon after that

Wow this sounds pretty exciting so far.........

10. My parents divorced.
11. My Mom became an alcoholic and lost custody of me, I think I was 4
12. My Dad was actually not in much better shape, just hid it better
13. I spent alot of time with my 2 Aunts, secretly wishing one of them would
       adopt me
14. My Dad had lots of girlfriends
15. I wanted every one of them to be my Mom
16. When he finally met the one that would become my Mom, I wanted nothing
       to do with her. I think my little heart was already hardened
17. I saw my Mom on and off during this time and never gave up hope of
      living with her
18. She has chosen a lifestyle to lead that I still cannot really talk about

okay now this is just sounded too sad.......

19. My favorite t.v. shows were Wonder Woman, Bionic Woman, and The 
      Muppets
20. I wanted to be a spy when I grew up
21. I lived with Dad, Step-Mom, Step-Sister, Step-Brother
22. I loved my Step-Sister
23. I used to sneak into her room to look at her stuff
24. I used to borrow her clothes without asking
25. I would spy on her and her friends
26. I would spy on her and her boyfriends
27. She really did not love me during this time
28. I made friends easy as a kid
29. But I was really shy
30. I was good at school but hated it
31. My favorite class in high school was English
32. It was the only class I actually tried to do well in
33. I lived with my Mom for part of my Junior year
34. I was not getting along with my Step-mom and Dad
35. My Mom tried to be "the Mom" but she was really more of a friend
36. I needed a MOM
37. That summer I lived with my Grandparents in Bellingham
38. I got a job as lifeguard at the kids pool
39. I spent the whole summer watching Moms with their kids
40. God started doing something in my heart
41. I went back to school my Senior year determined to be different
42. But I didn't know Jesus so I fell right back into my old ways
43. I was voted my Senior class Rebel      seriously
44. And Best Eyes
45. They said I couldn't have 2 in the year book, so they took the Best Eyes
      away
46. I am still a little bitter about that
47. I met my husband that year in Art class
48. He was a Junior
49. We tried dating
50. He got back together with an old girlfriend
51. We spent the next year just being friends
52. I moved out with my best friend right after we graduated
53. I was too scared to go to college
54. I worked full time in the cosmetic department of a drug store
55. I was promoted to Manager soon after
56. My friend moved back home
57. I stopped partying and work became my life
58. That same guy wanted to move in with me
59. I said no
60. Then I said yes
61. I gave my life to Jesus when I was 20
62. We got married and i got pregnant on our Honeymoon
63. I quit work
64. God showed me how to be a Mom
65. I had trouble getting pregnant again
66. I thought my daughter would be the only child I would ever have
67. I chose to Homeschool her so I could spend as much time with her as
      possible
68. After a 2 years of keeping track of the dates and my cycles I finally threw
      the calendar away and stopped
69. I got pregnant the next month
70. I went to the hospital one night with severe cramping and pain
71. The doctor told me I was probably having a miscarriage
72. My Mother-in-law was there and she prayed over me
73. I didn't miscarry
74. I went into labor one night and by the time we got to the hospital, 10
      minutes away, I was ready to have her
75. The E.R. doctor had to deliver her
76. When my 2nd daughter was born she was not breathing and was blue
77. The doctor took her and they spent 3 minutes trying to get her to breath
78. She did
79. This middle daughter of mine still keeps me on my toes!
80. My 3rd pregnancy was a total surprise
81. We moved across our state when I was pregnant
82. We lived in a one room cabin for a year and a half while we built our
      house
83. Then we lived in a tee-pee
84. Just kidding, seeing if you all are still paying attention
85. We really did live in the cabin though
86. It was fun
87. For awhile

okay here we are at pretty much present day...what can I tell you about myself....this is hard..........

88. I am still shy
89. I have lots of freckles
90. My still love my step-sister
91. Only now she does love me back
92. I love to read
93. I love to write, but it's hard
94. I have had dreams that have come true
95. Like real night time, sleeping, and you dream some thing about someone you know and then later it comes true.
96. All my childrens books I have written came to me at night
97. I love Jesus and can look back at my life and see His hand in it even when I didn't know Him
98. I love castles and hope to see some real ones someday
99. I love to clean and would even do that as a job
100. I hope God is not done with me yet, I have so many things deep down in my heart and even though they seem hidden and locked up right now, I pray that someday He will let them loose and use me.


Thanks for reading all this.
Was it boring?
Shocking?
Sound familiar?

Your turn. Tell me 100 things about yourself in the comments!!
No time for 100? Ok how about 1 or 2?
Or what you'd like best from my list?

Thursday, July 1, 2010

A Quote

Just wondered if anyone else needed to hear this amazing quote from Joel Osteen.
He didn't tell it to me in person, I just read it this morning.


The depth of your past is an indication of the height of your future.


I know my past is my past, but somedays it's there all to easy for me to remember.
This quote grabbed me this morning. Reminded me that it was all just a starting point for what God was going to do in my life.
Is still doing in my life.
That He would show me just how far He would take me from the past. How high He will lift me from my sins.
I am keeping my eyes up today.



For more daily encouragement from Joel Osteen go here.