Counting

I'm still tired and overwhelmed.

Just being honest.

I want to be able to say that yesterday after I put worship music on, told Satan to get behind me, and read just what I needed to from His word that everything got right in my world.
But it didn't.

And that's ok.
I know that becoming a Christian hasn't meant my troubles have gone away. Quite the opposite really.
But those troubles, well, they just make me long for Heaven even more.

I am not usualy a downer type of person. My faith has gotten me through some tough things. So I started thinking about my faith yesterday and was reminded of exactly what faith is.
It is believing something that you don't see.
You can't possibly see the answer. Can't see it. Nowhere. Impossible. Not gonna happen.
I have a few things in my life right now that I see no way out of. Impossible outcomes.
And cue...faith.
I have to live my life like a crazy person. Live like I want things to be not how they are. Not denial, but delusional....maybe. That's what the world would say if they could get into my mind and see how I'm picturing things as they are.

I just forgot yesterday. Or maybe it is a little tiring when you're trying to figure it out all by yourself. It took most of yesterday before I would let Jesus talk to me. And He knew it and He just patiently waited. Finally I heard Him say count. Count your blessings, name them one by one. And if your problem list out weighs your blessing list, well then come talk to me.

So I started counting and I named them one by one. Every little thing that has made me smile since giving my life to Him.
And I'm sure you can guess that there wasn't enough paper or time in the day to write them all down.

And alot of those blessings are things I could never have imagined happening or seen coming.

I am still tired and overwhelmed. But that just means my measure of faith must be big.

And if I am ever shopping with you someday and I'm trying on size 6 clothes, just know I'm living life by faith not by sight!